Papa Bear's post mentioning the contributions on the newsgroup by 
Scottish posters got me thinking what if all the regulars were 
members of their national squad in the coveted newsgroup world cup.  
We could have:

Scotland:

Ronnie the Tim would be the goalie, he keeps his cool well and isn't 
afraid to go to any lengths to thwart an attack, including taking 
legal action.

Paul Crankshaw is the big Englishman in defence, he does a lot of 
hardwork on the leagues in England, but, when it comes to the National 
team there's no denying where his loyalty lies.

JoBhoy is the annoying tim that nobody understands how he got into 
the squad when they don't even like him at his own club. He plays at 
left back, most people just wish he had been left back at home (the 
old ones are the oldest, I know).

The Bears, Ted E and Papa, complete the back four.  Both have had good 
seasons despite the fact their club failed to bring home any silverware. 
Although there has been criticisms from some quarters that they often 
failed to show up after poor results there is little doubt of their 
commitment.

In the midfield we have Alasdair Allan playing out on the right wing, 
some may say extreme right wing.  His workrate is usually very good, but 
he does have an unusual method of showing his loyalty by not turning up 
at all. Hopefully we can drum that out off him by the time the world cup 
starts.

On the left side is Moray Munro. An outstanding year for his club has 
gauranteed his selection.  He always puts in good quality work, but, 
tends to vanish for long spells.

Steven Goan the Hoops anchors the midfield. Did some good work towards 
the end of the season against Sammy Lives. The jury is still out on who 
won that battle, but in the end the Hoops won the war. He is a bit of a 
joker in the squad and should be good for team morale. Let's just hope 
he has recovered from the mistake he made of turning up in the wrong kit.

Stuart Graham gets the last midfield spot. His team have suffered quite a 
bit this year, but, Stuart has kept putting in steady performances.  Never 
very flashy or brilliant, he just quietly gets on with the job. Motherwell 
would do well to keep hold of him as a few continental clubs may try 
snatching him up on the Bosman rule.

Up front is 9iar. He is always on the attack, often to the detriment of team 
defence. But, he does get valuable goals for the team.

Supporting 9iar we have Sammy Lives. It is debatable whether or not anyone 
puts in more effort in the squad, and his hard work is often rewarded. There 
is a few question marks over how he'll match up against the big boys though.

Scotland may not have quite has much strength in depth as some other teams 
but there are a few good back up players waitng to step up if any injuries or 
suspensions occur. Brian Russell probably would have made the first team if 
he had put in more playing time.
==

England:

With Chris Applegate between the sticks England will be a tough team to beat. 
He has been consistant, hardworking and determined this year.  There's no 
doubting his effort, and don't be at all surprised to see him popping up to 
help out in attack for any last minute set pieces.

DocGonzo is a relative newcomer on the scene, but he has made an instant 
impression. He has no qualms about stepping on a few toes to get the job 
done. Some may be a little surprised at his inclusion so soon, but the boss 
thinks he could be one for the future.

Organising everything from the back is Paul Chan. He has many ideas about how 
things should be done and isn't afraid to tell anyone that will listen. Can 
usually be relied on to produce the results (whether they are right or not is 
another matter).

Ben Houlford is a regular for the gunners and after the season they have had 
it would be hard to deny him a place. Always tries to be the gentleman, but 
isn't afraid to dish out a hard tackle when needed.

Rounding out the defence is Man Utd's James.  A bit of an enigma, this one. 
His work is usually of the highest quality, but, if any criticism is to be 
levelled at him it would be that he sometimes has the tendancy to be too 
defensive. Having said that it is also fair to say he has scored one or two 
beauties.

On the right is Paul Louis, although he may not be an out and out right 
winger like Scotland's Allan, he makes no secret of preferring to play on 
the right. He's an important member of the England set up as he puts in so 
much effort, both in attack and defence. After a forgetable season for his 
club he'll be doing all he can to make up for it this summer.

Man Utd's Camel takes his place in the centre of midfield. He does a lot of 
hard work and is always dishing out annoying little tackles to anyone that 
tries to cause any problems. Well known as a man- marker, once you're in 
his 'file there's no return.

PJS makes it to the big squad, no mean feat for a non league player. The 
main question mark surrounding him is how he'll react to opposing fans 
chanting his unwanted nick-name.

Jeremy Dirckze gets the left wing slot. It may not be his best position, 
but since he plays for Liverpool it's compulsory for him to be out of 
position.

In attack we have Belinda. If an omnipotent, seven foot tall, black boxer 
doesn't scare the shit out of the other team's defence nothing will.

Up front with Belinda is Doggo. Despite missing a good part of the season 
there are high hopes he'll hit form at the right time. As long as he isn't 
sent off for sneezing within four feet of the ref.

One notable omission is Snaps. Many feel he should at least be in the 
squad as he often shows signs of undoubted talent, but, others feel he is 
just too lazy and only shows up when he can be arsed. Although he did put 
in an outstanding performance in a recent B team post it seems it wasn't 
good enough.

Chris Raistrick also misses out even though he has had a very good season, 
having worked is socks off and performed consistantly.  The Blackburn man 
may yet regret shunning the B team.
==

Other nations worth keeping an eye on are:
USA

RED DEVIL has been a Man Utd stalwart for many years. Unfortunately, his 
best days are now behind him. He is still capable of scoring the odd goal, 
but is as likely to run headfirst into his own goalpost.

John (Arthur?) Guiness is another US based Man Utd player and could be one 
to watch, he lacks nothing in the effort department.

Brian Pack from the MLS has shown some promising signs this year, can he 
make an impact on the national scene?

Singapore are really just a one man team with HoLY having to provide all 
the quality while his team mates scream around like headless chickens. It 
would be nice to see them do well, but it's questionable how far Ho can 
carry them.

And last but not.. er, actually...  And last and least we have Sweden. The 
Swedes have one of the biggest names in asseuk, Harald Sjoo. There is 
little to say that hasn't already been said about Harald. He is nothing if 
not persistant.  Unfortunately it is persistance that leads to his downfall. 
He will keep trying the same move over and over again, he always crosses when 
he doesn't need to and often his passes make no sense at all. In the end Harald 
is too easy to shut down due to his predictability.

And there you have it. Apologies to all that didn't make their team, and even
greater apologies to those that did :)

--
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